Shadows and Light

I had a weird dream on Thursday morning.

Now I have my fair share of unpleasant ones. Nightmares, if you will. These are usually in some hellish setting with your usual scenes of running, hiding, fighting or what-not. Trying to recollect exactly what happens is extremely hard as they fade off quickly within a day, compared to the happier ones. But hell pretty much sums it up, haha.

That one ended with me waking up. (Thankfully. Imagine never waking up in one of those sort of things.) It was almost 4AM, barely an hour after I had finished my duty shift and went to bed. The next dream I had is the one that unsettles me the most thus far. It pretty much ranks way up there in my list of “Things That Scar Me For Life”.

But seriously though. It started off pretty innocently and featured every single person in my life that mattered to me. Even the setting was as normal as can be, on our (dying) planet in our little city. That almost always predetermines that it would be a regular dream, sometimes a pleasant one if I’m lucky.

I won’t go into the details because I can’t remember them, but things just got messed up. Something was wrong and when I realized what it was, whatever it was, a feeling of emptiness vastly unimaginable filled me. For all the bad experiences in my life, what I felt then was incomparable. Suicidal depression was like taking a stroll through a kitten park.

Somehow or other it ended but that feeling lingered on. I pretty much just sat up on the bed for the remaining hours up until 6:30 doing nothing. It’s passed by now, whatever it was. All I remember is being scared, lonely and lost.

That dream has effectively taken top spot for worst nightmare. The previous holder was one I had back during my primary-school days, when I was living in Marine Parade. Basically I dreamt that I woke up. Then I woke up. And woke up. And woke up. And woke up etc. These aren’t anything unusual but then, it felt like it would never end. Easily surpassed ten waking cycles.

Well in any case, I got by that Thursday OK and by the time I was at the chalet, I was back to my usual self. I’m not sleeping in the guardroom anymore!

m-flo loves YOSHIKA
Beat Space Nine (2005)
Avex Group

I was playing around with light- shadow contrast and got a mixed bag of results.

The Chevrons. An army chalet held with NSF mates. Was a depressing thought. Very messy picture but I just wanted to get the window there. Can't crop effectively either, so here it is in original form.

While waiting for the keys and stuff. Wish I had proper depth of field control here to just keep the furniture.

The pool, center of the chalet complex. It was pretty nice but I didn't go in (obviously). I cannot figure out why I took this indoors...

First things first: crash on the couch

Time to explore the place! This must lead to the BBQ pit...

On the other side of the door. Meranti's the name of the unit. I have no idea what it means and don't intend to look it up.

Hmm, no BBQ pit here. Turns out it was further down, beyond the greenery on the right.

Wait is that a--? Yeah, we were gonna eat near a storm drain. Fun!

Time to go up! Gotta check behind you once in a while in these sort of places...

The Balcony. I hope there's a better view from up here!

Oh, nope! No great view here; blocked by oddly placed trees.

The bed. Nice interior concept for one's own house! If your bedroom was two storeys tall, haha. How I wish.

From over the bedroom railing. Not taken by me as you can see me downstairs. Unless...!

Me attempting serious photography with my rangefinder. Who's the mysterious cameraman now?!

Busy at work setting up the chalet. This here is the brave soul who organized it

After which one slacks off. Come to think of it, this POV-shot makes it look like a porno...

With only FTA channels at my disposal, I settled for the news.

After some time people invaded my couch. It was starting to get a little boring there.

If I stare at the TV long enough, maybe something will happen.

Aha our mysterious cameraman! Actually no, he only took the three-man couch photo. Who took the others...? And yes, that's my rangefinder. Everybody molests it :(

People are arriving! Crowding round the mahjong table

More arrivals! That is an awesome keyboard-thingy. Since it's getting livelier around here, I guess it's time I...

...become the Photog-rist! Face-mask, shades, camo-netting and gloves. No reason to act normal at a chalet, haha

I hid under a table and piled the bags around it. I lay prone on the floor with the camo netting over my back. I was like a hunter amongst men, hurr

Bwaha unsuspecting victim! Bonus for preemptive strike!

Another hidden shot from upstairs! ...then I was starting to feel like some gay voyeur

Decided to give the hiding photography a rest and reveal myself.

I look like a granny here, hahaha. A granny with a tile pyramid!

Playing mahjong. No, I'm serious. Picked it up and haven't fully learnt all the aspects, but it's oh so fun

The BBQ is about to begin. Finally! Guess what's wrong with this picture! Got it? Yeah, no girls...

Checking out the area. It has lots of space at least.

Hiding from the smoke before it permeates my clothing entirely. The Pupil is showing on TV too

Food! Or rather, uncooked food. The problem with a large BBQ is lots of cooking and very little eating.

And then the whole thing got cut short with some bad army news I shall not disclose here. Nobody was happy about it since we had to return to camp the next day. It turned out to be a waste of time as suspected as all we did was… nothing! And I had to miss my dental appointment which I can no longer reschedule because it’s full up until I ORD. Sigh.

Anyway, having a smaller BBQ-gathering with friends is much more fun than something this big. Also, I may have quit drinking but there was only beer there. Meh. Hopefully the next friends-only one would turn out to be better. Oh wait, it will!

(1) Condominium
(2) Not homosexual
(3) Nobody you dislike

I wonder how the film pictures turn out. Ah, the anticipation of waiting!

2 thoughts on “Shadows and Light

  1. OMG this is my favorite entry on your entire blog, honestly.
    I TOTALLY DIG THE GRANNY SHOT, wtf it’s sooooooooo hilarious I have half a mind posting everywhere to show people. CAN I?


    And yes to the gay voyeur! This entry really made me laugh out loud…….. Gosh I can’t stop.

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